The other day I was thinking about how terrible racial slurs are.
I mean, for a white guy.
Are you honestly going to look me in the face, in rage, and say cracker?
I’m going to respond, yeah it’s in aisle 14 next to the cookies.
You’re calling me a honkey?
I’m going to say, Uh did you mean donkey?
And if so, just shorten it up and call me an ass.
Don’t try to be high-brow with some iota of class.
Where is Pocahontas?
And I’m talking for white men, not white women.
White women can be called bitches, sluts, whores, hoes, or worse Tiger Woods wife.
But you can be every shade of the rainbow and get that nametag – except for Tiger’s wife, he doesn’t roll that way.
White guys get the pass with the bullshit tags.
Can’t we get better insults than these?
Do you realize almost every serial killer is a white dude?
Call me Dahmer! I’ll promise not to think you mispronounced dumber.
How about Bundy? It could be mocking Ted or Al, and I’m sure at least a few will be upset.
You can say stuff like wigger, 8 Mile, and redneck
And I promise that I’ll hold in the laughter.
For serious this stuff doesn’t hurt.
None of what I said has the power or velocity of the N-bomb, or um wait this makes me uncomfortable.
I seriously read that people bust on white dudes by calling them Crisco.
Really? Is that even supposed to make a dent?
The slurs suck because we hold the keys
There is no pain behind them.
Years of slavery for white dudes don’t exist.
Intolerance seems to only occur for the ones not in charge.
I say fuck that.
White guys, we need to unite and get our own N-word.
We need to feel that pain.
We need to know that hurt.
We need to understand.
I want someone to bust on white people but feel slightly uncomfortable doing it.
You know why? Because it means the power is distributed.
People are more equal.
How great would it be to say the W-bomb.